By Kari Kelly
Ten years ago, I felt like I was called to do a PhD in physics and by the second year I knew that I was sinking! I was sinking because I listened to LIES. I started my PhD with the idea that I was called to solve what is known as the problem of time in quantum gravity. My warped understanding of God was that He gave me this difficult mission, and it was all up to me to make it come to pass. This unbelief in God’s good nature and lack of love brought great fear of failure, which led to my constant striving and drivenness. It was all up to me! This kept me confused and tormented, and my health and performance declined. I was sinking fast!
Fear can come from many directions; 1) fear of man, 2) fear of rejection, 3) fear of abandonment, 4) fear of failure, or one of the other 4,000 recognized fears. What can you do when one or more of these fears press in on you? Are you stuck at a point where fear has you in its grasp? I call this point WALLOW – a place where you are totally consumed with fear, or “wallowing” in your fears and circumstances, unable to move forward.
You can recognize this WALLOW phase when you find yourself being attacked in your body and your spirit. Our body takes a hit when our glands secrete large amounts of adrenaline and cortisol, which over time will destroy our immune system and the calcium in our bones. Our spirit man takes a hit too. We feel powerless, doomed and scared. We feel alone in the situation, helpless, abandoned by God. We end up rejecting the fullness of His love walking in suspicion and distrust. Our perceptions get warped and our judgment is impaired. We are consumed with terror, dread, horror, fright, panic, alarm, apprehension, worry, concern, and anxiety on many levels.
The two common responses are FIGHT and FLIGHT.
You try to FIGHT in your own strength; confronting the situation with everything in you, with all your strength, power, time, heart, mind, body, and soul. You become consumed with the fight, surviving and overcoming it. This opens the door to REBELLION, CONTROL, and DIVINATION because you try to take charge (control) to make survival happens, and the need to know (divination) comes in when you become paranoid and obsessed with keeping tabs on everything, trying to manipulate everything, including God, to ensure that your plans come to pass (instead of resting in faith and believing the fact that God is sovereign and in control).
The other common response is FLIGHT when you engage in avoidance and/or mentally check out in certain areas at certain levels (i.e., living in denial). Hearing God in these areas becomes difficult. You become unreceptive to people’s feedback or opinions. You avoid confronting truth, obvious facts or situations at all cost. You become paranoid and afraid, always finding evidence that worst case scenarios are coming to pass. You are always asking the question “What If?” and as Mom (Bryn) says, “What ifs sink ships!”
So how do you move from WALLOW to the next phase – WILLING?
WILLING is the point where you choose to live by FAITH and not by SIGHT; where you stand on FAITH! When you do this, remarkable things can happen in your body and in your spirit. The body stops producing those toxic hormones and chemicals and returns to homeostasis – a balanced, healthy state for the body. Your spirit rests in peace and comfort, knowing you are held in the loving arms of our Father. You choose to step up into the identity and authority of who you are in Christ!
The opposite of FIGHT or FLIGHT is STANDING. STANDING in faith, not WALLOWING in fear. You are to stand fast in the liberty with which Christ made you free on the Cross. Note that liberty means authority! You must stand up in faith, holding fast to the Word. Making this choice is using your authority, and thus something very real happens in the spirit when you make choices! Setting your love on Him and trusting Him is a choice!!
Once you set your love on Him and trust Him, you can stop STANDING and start WALKING! We take our peace from Jesus, embrace a more solid sense of self-identity in Him, a deeper trust in God, and begin walking in victory!
You are in a spiritual battle! When you find yourself WALLOWING and being tempted by FIGHT or FLIGHT, be WILLING to live by Faith and not by sight. STAND firm in Faith and begin WALKING in confidence! These Power Tools of being WILLING, STANDING and WALKING will see you through to victorious living!